2009-02-24 12:03:06 -
Men placing personal ads in the hope of meeting women should avoid 'an over-emphasis on sexual activity' or using the phrase 'NSA' [No Strings Attached], suggests a study into the secrets of writing a successful personal ad.
An over-emphasis on sex is identified as the biggest turn-off about personal ads for single women, in a poll of British singletons conducted by YouGov on behalf of Craigslist (www.craigslist.co.uk), the free classified ads website used by a growing number of Brits for internet dating. Only 'boasting or bragging' repels women as much, also identified as the biggest turn-off by 20% of single females.
In the same vein, over twice as many women (14%) as men (6%) identify 'NSA' ['No Strings Attached'] as the phrase most likely to discourage them from meeting the person placing the ad.
Personal ads work best, finds the study, if they are short and amusing, while avoiding both boasting and bitterness.
While an over-emphasis on
sex particularly repels women, the biggest single turn-off for both sexes is the phrase, 'Prove to me that all men/women are not dogs/pigs'.
'That kind of stuff only makes you seem bitter' advises Diane Mapes, author of the book 'How To Date In A Post-Dating World' (Sasquatch Books). 'Tired of women/men who play games', is another phrase to avoid, for similar reasons, she advises.
Craigslist commissioned YouGov to ask 490 British singles a series of questions about what kind of personal ads and phrases commonly used in such ads were most likely to repel or attract them to meeting the person placing the ad.
'Prove to me that all men/women are not dogs/pigs' was identified as the phrase most likely to repel by nearly four times (37%) as many respondents as the next biggest turn-off, which was 'NSA' [No Strings Attached], named by 10%. The next most off-putting phrases were respectively 'Looking for a real man/woman' (9%) and 'Wants soul mate' (7%).
The term 'NSA', however, turned off women far more than men. Over twice as many women (14%) as men (6%) picked 'NSA' as the phrase most likely to repel them. Meanwhile, 12 times as many men (12%) identified 'NSA' as the phrase most likely to make them positively want to meet the advertiser.
'Friendship first', followed by 'GSOH' [Good sense of humour] were the phrases identified by most respondents as the ones most likely to make them actively want to meet the person advertising. Over twice as many women (22%) as men (10%) picked 'Friendship first' as the phrase most likely to attract them.
Other notable gender differences were:
- Over three times as many women as men identified 'over-emphasis on sexual activity' as the thing about a personal ad most likely to repel them from wanting to meet the person advertising.
- Boasting turns off women more than men. Almost twice as many women (20%) as men (11%) named 'boasting or bragging' as the thing most likely to repel them from wanting to meet the person placing the ad.
- Almost three times as many men (20%) as women (7%) named 'No photograph' as the thing most likely to repel them.
The YouGov findings chime with the more informal research conducted by Diane Mapes in the attempt to answer the question, 'What works best on Craigslist?'.
'According to my sources, it's:
A catchy headline (as in witty, not one that references your STDs),
A short and sweet list of what you're hoping to find
A recent, decent photo. Preferably one where you're not standing next to a car, motorcycle, Jet Ski, 18-wheeler, large dead fish, brand-new bride, bed covered in stuffed animals or figurine collection.'
"Men always complain about the verbose posts from women, so I used a bullet-pointed list," one source told Mapes, via e-mail. "I got 286 responses in six days. I felt like I cracked some kind of code."
Concludes Mapes: 'With luck -- and a little attention to detail -- you can crack the Craigslist code as well.'
FIVE TIPS FOR WRITING SUCCESSFUL PERSONAL ADS
Keep it short and sweet.
Aim for an amusing headline (especially if you're male)
Avoid boasting and bragging (especially if you're male)
Include a photograph (especially if you're female)
Avoid bitterness
TOP TIPS FOR MEN SEEKING WOMEN
- Avoid over-emphasis on sex or advertising for 'NSA'
- Aim for an amusing headline
- Avoid boasting and bragging
TOP TIPS FOR WOMEN SEEKING MEN
- Include a photograph
- Include the term 'NSA' [No strings attached].
TOP PHRASES (AND SENTIMENTS) TO AVOID
'Prove to me that all men/women are not dogs/pigs.'
'NSA' [No Strings Attached]
'Looking for a real man/woman'
FURTHER INFO: Mick Thorburn,
mick@thorburnmedia.co.uk
ABOUT CRAIGSLIST: Craigslist.org is an online notice-board and free classified ads site, with local sites in over 550 locations across the world, including London (
www.craigslist.co.uk) and 26 other UK cities or counties.
ABOUT THE POLL: All figures, unless otherwise stated, are from YouGov Plc. Total sample size was 490 adults. The survey was carried out online. The figures have been weighted and are representative of all GB adults (aged 18+).
